How many of you married guys

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Gainfreak":0703b said:
There is a differance between supporting your family and going off to play rockstar. If I was offered a gig by a MAJOR label and it meant touring and possibly becomming a millionare, I would do it FOR MY family even given the scenario of your son. Although it might seem selfish in the beginning, It would mean a better life for me and my family and would open up doors for a lifetime.
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That's the only way I'd even consider it. Plus, I've got hundreds of thousands wrapped up in my cattle operation, it's not a job I can just quit on a whim. *IF* that touring gig paid me enough that I could hire a full time manager and farm hand to run things while I was on the road, AND enough that my wife could quit her job and she and the kids could go with me, I might consider it.

I enjoy my life now though, and have the best of both worlds. A band that plays as often as we want to, a job I love, and a stable home with my wife an kids who are my #1 priority in life. I'd have to make a SHITLOAD of money to even think about thinking about doing something like that.
 
leave my wife and 4 kids for months at a time, make mega millions, total rock star?

no friggin way, I have seen what the kids of those families turn into. Gestappo daddy still has a few years of active duty left before he gets any leave, and then hopefully there will be grandchildren to keep in line
bwahahahahhahahahahahahahahaha
 
I have been married for 8 years and have 2 kids, ages 4 and almost 2. I play in 2 gigging bands and travel a decent amount around Texas. This next month we are playing shows all over Texas and I can tell you that I will miss my kiddos (and wife), no doubt. A few years ago I was fortunate to tour overseas for a couple months and it was awesome and I had a blast, and I made great money. That was before the kids though. Don't know if I could do it now unless the situation was perfect and we all know that is a one in a million chance...I am lucky to have a wife that supports my music 100%. I stay at home during the day with my boys while she works and I work out of my studio here on my property and also work as a sound engineer in Austin. My boys are being raised day-care free and that is the way I want it. If I went on tour for a long period, they would most definitely have to go to daycare and I really want to avoid that. So the answer is...I have no idea! :)
 
Been happily married 32 years five kids nice house in the country good job surf on the weekends local gig at church . I don't wanna mess with all of that.
 
When I was younger, I would have jumped on a deal in a heart beat. At 32 with two children, I would have to say that the kind of deal I would need to make me jump is very unlikely. Lables don't hand the kind of money that I would need to new bands.

I make an decent living and can support my family comfortably right now. I could not feel right about leaving my wife and children in a position that would lower their quality of life. That's not what being a responsible parent and respectful partner is about. My family are priority one. Being a parent means making personal scarifices. And I make them without any ill will toward my kids. I want them to be able to live their dreams. And I believe that being there for them is a very important thing in their developement. But that's just my two cents...
 
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Mike_V":86634 said:
would leave your wife and kids behind for a chance to join a traveling touring band?

Thumps post has drawn the curiosity out of me when he said kidingly about being asked to join the band he is gigging with this week. I know he has a young baby at home. Would he or you leave a young baby/kids behind for a chance to persue his/your dream?

I ask this because I know my son, whose dream it was/is to get signed to a lable and tour, now at 27 has done a 180 on this subject--his band was approached recently by a management/indie record company to sign with them. In talking to him on the way home from his show (where they were approached in Orlando) he didnt seem too interested--to even tour the state of Florida (where we live) while being promoted by the company.

It would mean leaving his day job, a 13 month old baby and 6 month pregnant wife behind. He wouldnt do that unless they were signed by a major record lable with a chance to make BIG money.

How about you married guys with young kids--would you leave to pursue your life long dream?
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Dude, this is STOOPID! Sorry, but a good wife and family that loves and cares for you is worth more than anything on this tiny little globe.

I know.
 
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Gainfreak":4e65c said:
There is a differance between supporting your family and going off to play rockstar. If I was offered a gig by a MAJOR label and it meant touring and possibly becomming a millionare, I would do it FOR MY family even given the scenario of your son. Although it might seem selfish in the beginning, It would mean a better life for me and my family and would open up doors for a lifetime.
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Part of me agrees with what Ralph said above. But the other part of me says no way. And the main reason for that is , once you miss the brief time it takes for your kids to grow up, its gone. There is no going back.

To me that is worth far more than money or my dream. Once kids enter the picture they are your main responsibility, million dollar job offer or not. If you can't be around to influence them while they are growing up, you shouldn't have them. I know I am gonna catch 2 tons of hatemail for that but I don't care. Either make the commitment to the kids or don't have them.... :D
 
Ralphie, I have to disagree with you on this one as well
If that kind of money became available to your family (where you could justify spending time away from then and guiding them thru the formative years) It wouldn't replace the impact your presence would have on them.
kids are kids, give them an inch, they take a mile. tell them they're special, and if your not careful they become arrogant. teach them that they are better than everyone else, and they become terrible adults. let someone else raise them with out constraint or limits, and they develop into happy little sociopaths.
they didnt ask to be brought into the world, we did that to them. so, if we make the conscious decision to create life, were responsible for it till it can govern its own destiny, and great wealth cannot make up for proper upbringing, no matter what you have heard. quality of life for a child is not in what monitary assets you can give them but how much of yourself you can.
just my outlook on it.

Peace

T
 
If I got to play rockstar for a while and get paid a ton of money, I think my wife would be packing my bags, wishing me luck but making sure I come home to her.

It would also mean I have musical talent FTW! :D

I'm not sure *I* could do it though....have 7 and almost 3 year old girls...they rule!
 
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Tnjpekar":568b1 said:
Ralphie, I have to disagree with you on this one as well
If that kind of money became available to your family (where you could justify spending time away from then and guiding them thru the formative years) It wouldn't replace the impact your presence would have on them.
kids are kids, give them an inch, they take a mile. tell them they're special, and if your not careful they become arrogant. teach them that they are better than everyone else, and they become terrible adults. let someone else raise them with out constraint or limits, and they develop into happy little sociopaths.
they didnt ask to be brought into the world, we did that to them. so, if we make the conscious decision to create life, were responsible for it till it can govern its own destiny, and great wealth cannot make up for proper upbringing, no matter what you have heard. quality of life for a child is not in what monitary assets you can give them but how much of yourself you can.
just my outlook on it.

Peace

T
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i'm sure PLENTY of fukked up kids havve had both parents in the house at all times...just cuz you ain't there, doesn't mean they're completely fukked for life dude. trust me, i know.
 
just cuz you wanna leave to go on tour, doesn't mean you hate your kids...or your wife. jesus, some of you guys are really extreme about this shit. y'all act like you're never comin' back...all tours end at some point. christ.
 
Someone hit the nail on the head earlier. For me (I have a 1 year old), the amount of money required to even consider it is out of the question for any record company. I know its a "grass is greener" situation - everyone thinks about how great touring is, but I'm sure that once the tour starts, I'd be thinking about my daughter and be pissed at myself for going. Fortunately, I'm 31, and that's WAAAAY too old to "make it."

There has always been a part of me that wanted to hear one of my songs on the radio though.
 
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j666":bfac8 said:
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i'm sure PLENTY of fukked up kids havve had both parents in the house at all times...just cuz you ain't there, doesn't mean they're completely fukked for life dude. trust me, i know.
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I dig it, but I do know that kids have more of a chance with two strong parents than one. I also know that when you replace one of those influences with money, the result is very rarely positive, and on this I do present some authority.
 
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mysticaxe":a3989 said:
Someone hit the nail on the head earlier. For me (I have a 1 year old), the amount of money required to even consider it is out of the question for any record company. I know its a "grass is greener" situation - everyone thinks about how great touring is, but I'm sure that once the tour starts, I'd be thinking about my daughter and be pissed at myself for going. Fortunately, I'm 31, and that's WAAAAY too old to "make it."

There has always been a part of me that wanted to hear one of my songs on the radio though.
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i've never had any delusions about touring NOT being work...or missing family, or friends, or loved ones...i'd go in a second, money not an issue cuz money wasn't the reason i first started playing guitar...and yes, i'd miss my girl and kids the ENTIRE time i was away. eventually, i'd come back tho...
 
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Tnjpekar":3a0a1 said:
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I dig it, but I do know that kids have more of a chance with two strong parents than one. I also know that when you replace one of those influences with money, the result is very rarely positive, and on this I do present some authority.
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well, these days with ipods, computers, kickass toys and video games, both parents working due to inflation...some kids hardly see their parents and they all live in the same house and are home every night. agreed, money IS the root of all evil tho and is very influential. having 2 parents is ultimately the goal but it seems very rare these days. i have tons of friends and my kids have alot of friends that have divorced parents and sometimes it takes a toll and other times it has virtually no effect at all. purely situational i guess...
 
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Mike_V":9d43b said:
would leave your wife and kids behind for a chance to join a traveling touring band?

How about you married guys with young kids--would you leave to pursue your life long dream?
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No way. This is just a very expensive hobby now. I can't get back the time away from my kids (ages 7, 4, and 3).

I gave up the aspirations of "being somebody" in the guitar world a long time ago.....
 
All this talk about money, yet no one is bringing up this little fact: copious amounts of blowjobs from young tender honeys with high moisture content.
 
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Gainfreak":d7ea0 said:
There is a differance between supporting your family and going off to play rockstar. If I was offered a gig by a MAJOR label and it meant touring and possibly becomming a millionare, I would do it FOR MY family even given the scenario of your son. Although it might seem selfish in the beginning, It would mean a better life for me and my family and would open up doors for a lifetime.
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+1.
 
I gave up steady gigging for my ex and would NEVER do that again. The girls I date now KNOW that either they enjoy the music part of my life or find another dude.
That said I would not tour if it meant leaving my family behind. As long as my kids are in school I aint going anywhere........Which is where I belong/Nowhere :D........John
 
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