I have one of those cheap amazon DB meters on the wall, and I find the most comfortable volume I play is in the 90-100 DB range, but I'm not sure quite how accurate that thing is. It's loud enough that it sounds fun and shakes the floor a little, but not so loud that I am in pain or can't hear someone yelling to me. I have turned up louder but usually with headphones or earplugs on. However I don't have a shared wall with a neighbor and so on, so I wouldn't consider that volume to be my "bedroom" volume, I'd be aiming for 70-80db for that, such as if I had an apartment or had someone else in the house trying to watch TV or something like that while I practiced. That's what I think a lot of people are asking when they ask about bedroom volume, they mean quiet enough that it's not bothering other people in their house - not everyone has a nice studio or garage where they can play 100db without annoying other people.
I do worry about hearing long term but I try to be careful. I definitely play quieter than many live shows and other events I've been to, some of those I'm even covering my ears, if anything to protect them so I can at least damage them later myself. If I'm going to kill my hearing, I at least want it to be something I enjoy doing. I went to see Springstein with my family and I basically had to cover my ears the whole time, I'm sure there'll be jokes about the music lol but I mean, it was so fricken loud it was near physical pain. Half my section cleared out before it was over, I wasn't the only one with hands over ears. Not sure why these venues will take every measure to protect hearing down on the stage and then blast 120db straight into the seats from 20 feet away. It's also why I haven't been back to that venue even though a few bands I actually like have come through lately.