I’ve seen videos of a 16 year old trans kid saying, “since I’ve been on testosterone, my voice has become way too deep, and I now suffer from male pattern baldness.” He stressed that he is unhappy with how deep his voice became, like it was way too deep. His horror over over starting balding at 16 was breaking him down. I’ve seen others saying how they became very angry all the time, as well as becoming much more depressed than before taking T. Some said they felt tired and without energy after taking T for a prolonged period. Their long list of complaints was never ending and the mental repercussions were vast and sad.
The ONE THING they all said was, “I wish SO BAD that someone would have told me that these kinds of side effects were a real possibility.” They spoke of being worse off mentally now, than pre transition. They all said nobody warned them, and expected life to be a miraculous and joyful after they began their transitions. But they said that after taking T for a while their misery grew so much worse.
You should point out that by no means will his life instantly become better. And that, in fact, the possibility exists that it will actually become much worse. How would he feel if he entered the realm of male pattern baldness so severely that he would become chrome done by 18? How would he feel, mentally, if that happened? What if he becomes a rage monster like some trans kids taking a lot of T?
I take T myself because my system basically stopped producing it after a head injury in a car accident. I take mine up to regular levels and I can feel elevated anger at times, I can take a step back and see that my anger is not logical for the situation that caused it. At times I am much quicker to frustration and and feel like hulking out at times.
I have seen many videos of trans people who said that they were gay, but the social climate made it seem like it’s more socially acceptable to be trans than gay. So, with social pressure from friends that decided they were trans. They all say they wished they didn’t take T or estrogen and permanently changed their bodies. They said they should have listened to themselves and how they felt rather than friends, and sometimes even family who pressured them into becoming trans rather than admitting to themselves they were gay.
You should point out to him that many of the changes that take place are in fact permanent. That if he decides he is gay, or perhaps even straight, there is no coming back from some of the changes that physically occur. Tell him to wait until he is 18 and give it some serious consideration during that time.
I spoke to a friend of mine whose kid is in a local middle school and she said that there is now elevated social status for kids who come out as transgender. It’s even considered cool sometimes, but she said most of them decided within a year or two that they weren’t trans.
My friend who told me this is a doctor and she said by no means is it safe for a teenage girl to start slamming their body and system with large amounts of testosterone. Many of the changes are not reversible and will stay that way for your life. Its a MAJOR DECISION that most teenagers can’t fully comprehend. She said she would never let her son or daughter alter their system like that while under her roof and said she would plead with them not to do it after they leave home.
Then you see the kids who say it saved their lives. What to do? I would much rather let my kid transition if it would save his/her life. I would stress out worrying about the permanent changes and potential mental downswing, but that is better than losing a child.
I’ve seen many teenagers and early twenty something’s saying they wish someone would have told them that these types of things can happen. Instead they were met with congratulations from their doctors, shrinks, and friends on how cool it is they are trans. Not long after, their regret sets in and their mental health starts to decline. It’s very sad.
You should find as many of those videos and stories as you can and show him that negative side effects do happen, and happen a lot. Show him it’s ok to be gay, and that he should not give in to social pressure. If he is gay, cool, that’s fine. Show him how many detransitioners say they are gay, and not trans, but listened to EVERYONE BUT THEMSELVES.
Point out that it’s not all easy roads ahead if he takes T. So many said they desperately wished anyone at all would have told them that side effects occur and that their mental health could get much worse and not better at all like they are told.
I hope this works out ok for you.
